Needing more

I have not slept well for a very long time.  I went to BV hoping to play, but that did not happen.   In October, I was given the opportunity to experience fire play.  And that was a rush.  Although I loved the play and the company (X and Slitty)  I didn't get into subspace.  Fire play is a different experience.  It is a lot of work.  The impact and mental stimulation is different than the average slap and tickle play.  I enjoy hard long play sessions that end in bruises and a drunken high from the endorphin rush.  Fire eventually burns out, and a lengthy scene is not possible even with multiple floggers.  The fiberglass tools combined with the fuel are quite heavy.  When a set of floggers go dry, the fire dies, new floggers are lit.  I think the repetition of heavy to light then again to heavy would be exhausting.  Not to mention the mental exhaustion involved with making sure that nothing tragic happens.  I do not envy the talented Master that welded those floggers.   Although the scene was too short for me to reach subspace,  it was a wonderful night.  I had a wonderful time.  I had some interesting marks the next day.  However, the intensity and depth was not enough to get me to that place where I am able to reset my soul and sleep.   I need more.